Story: Marjorie Ingrall  
Illustration: Tom Reis

I've always been intimidated by craps. Not to revel in base girly stereotypes, but all those numbers and lines and incomprehensible words … well, it seemed like some scary offshoot of math class. The table looked like a giant, boy-centric board game. And with expressions like “don’t come” and “don’t pass” ... it resembled a combination bad date and miserable high school flashback. Uh, no thanks!

So when M lifestyle asked me to learn to play, I explained that this was akin to asking Barbie to understand relativity. But after a couple of hours with Vice President of Table Games at Bellagio, Bill Bingham, and President of MGM MIRAGE Marketing, Joe Brunini, I actually knew my way around the table, and I actually played, and I had a wicked good time! Now, because I am so sisterly, I am delighted to share my hard-won knowledge with my fellow crap-phobic ladies.

Five delightful things I learned about craps…

Discovery No. 1: Craps is the pep rally of table games.
Nowhere else in the casino will you hear so much cheering or see so much supportive backslapping. Everyone in that dice pit appears to want everyone else to do well. It’s so supportive and cute; it’s like the day of state championships. As Bill put it, “With blackjack you’re playing your hand; with roulette you’re playing your numbers. But in craps, almost all the people are cheering the same way. It’s an inherently social game.” And if you hit a streak, you will be treated like Mother Theresa in the body of Cindy Crawford.

Discovery No. 2: The dealer is your best friend.
This was my happiest discovery. Dealers are thrilled to teach you the game and to impart their professional knowledge to you. I played my very first game at an MGM Grand table presided over by a dealer named Teddybear. Teddybear! How can you lose with someone named Teddybear? (In fact, I didn’t.) Teddybear was a funny, supportive and superb instructor.

Discovery No. 3: You can ignore big chunks of the table! See that box on the craps table with all the little pictures of dice pairings on it, with maybe some words like “horn” and “any craps” around them? Ignore it completely. See the part under the area that says “COME” and “FIELD”? Ignore that too! When you’re a beginner, if you just focus on the “PASS” and “COME” lines and those big numbers above the “COME” line, you’re not only learning the fundamentals of the game, you’re actually betting smart.

Discovery No. 4: You can learn at your own pace.
It’s helpful to play your first game when the table isn’t too busy. The dealer will have even more time to show you the ropes and you won’t be embarrassed by your cluelessness when there are few people at the table. I didn’t know you could get chips from a dealer. I didn’t know there was a handy little shelf under the table to put your drink on; I was balancing my Tanqueray No. Ten and tonic on the padded armrest until a fellow player kindly pointed out this clever aspect of craps table design. I didn’t know that the expression “playing the field” was a reference to craps. Rest assured that when you show up at the table, you will look like a rocket scientist in comparison.

Discovery No. 5: There are excellent vocabulary words in craps.
After a half-hour or so, I was throwing around phrases like “odds on my six” with abandon. I felt very jaunty and macha. Plus I understood expressions like “the hard way,” “big eight” and “boxcars,” though I didn’t bet them. This too made me feel very savvy and hard and glamorous, like a ’40s movie heroine.

The very basic rules:

First of all, in your guest room, there’s a Gaming Guide pamphlet that explains precisely how to play. It even has a detailed list of odds for various bets, which you can refer to at the gaming table if you like. In a scintillating way, this act of peeking at your little crib sheet will remind you of cheating in algebra, except that it is totally legal!

You can bet against others and even against yourself, betting “Don’t Pass” and “Don’t Come,” but very few people do that. And why would you? It’s so antisocial! So much of the fun of craps is the camaraderie, with everyone at the table rooting and cheering for the same numbers.

Admittedly, the game goes fast and it can be confusing. In the beginning, I really had no idea what was happening and blithely made about $100 in 10 minutes. (I sort of thought this was how the game worked. You put down money and they gave you more money.) But then I became aware of this guy betting against me and got flustered. (Why did he think I was a loser? That jerk!)

Look, there are a lot of possible bets, but for now, just focus on “PASS” and “COME” bets. But hey, if you have an occasional powerful urge to bet a certain number, go for it. Call it women’s intuition. Look at it as a wacky, fun, Lotto-like wager. But girlfriend, if you actually do win, you’ll rake it in. As Joe laughingly put it, when I asked him whether it was better to have luck or skill, “I’d rather have luck and skill!”